Ask the Child Therapist Episode 21: What Causes Bullying?


John sits in the back of the classroom. The teacher calls on him to read. His heart races. He stammers and stutters. His hands begin to shake. 

Billy smells weakness and he pounces. He contorts his face and mimics the words sputtering out of John’s mouth.

The classroom breaks out in laughter as John tries to blink away his tears.


Billy is the reason why John cries every morning.

Billy is the reason why John sits alone.

Billy is the reason why John feels worthless.

And this is just kindergarten.

Kids can be unbelievably cruel. What causes bullying? I will share what bullies reveal in therapy and what they say you should do to make them stop.

They have no remorse. They have no guilt. What makes kids this cruel? 

I have a rare glimpse into what causes bullying. I get to peak behind the curtain in my therapy office. I see their weaknesses. Their family dynamics. The necessary ingredients needed for the cruelness to begin. 

Want to know why a kid too young to tie his own shoes can be so cruel? Want to know what they say you can do to stop them? Watch this:


Other Articles on What Causes Bullying:

Effects of Bullying

5 Ways to Stop Bullying and Move into Action

Stomp Out Bullying. Why Do Kids Bully?

Don’t Let Your Kid be a Bully. 6 Ways to Teach Kindness.

Why I Bully Your Kid. And How You Can Stop Me.


Books on How to Deal with Bullying: