Ask the Child Therapist Episode 37: Helping Kids Who Have a Fear of Germs

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 37: Helping Kids Who Have a Fear of Germs

Your child is paralyzed. She stares at the bathroom door unable to go through. She grabs the door handle with her shirt, fumbling to get it open. You’ve watched her wash her hands until they are raw. It seems like most questions that come out of her mouth are about germs. What is going on with her? This new fear of germs is taking over her life. How can you help?

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 36: Do You Want to Help a Child with Anxiety? First You Have to Learn How to Talk About it.

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 36: Do You Want to Help a Child with Anxiety? First You Have to Learn How to Talk About it.

Your child is refusing to get out of the car. “What’s wrong!” You ask, growing more impatient. “I don’t want to go.” Your child pouts. “But why?” You beg, glancing at the time and wondering what excuse you’ll tell your boss this time. “I just don’t want to!” She screams at you. You’ve done this dance many times before. You wonder, how are you supposed to help a child with anxiety when they won’t even talk about it?

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 35: Teaching Kids Social Skills | Helping Kids Thrive When They Have No Social Skills.

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 35: Teaching Kids Social Skills | Helping Kids Thrive When They Have No Social Skills.

Your daughter is a leg hugger, a wallflower, a blank staring mute when others are around. You watch as her personality literally melts away from her when she’s in public. Where did your crazy, free spirited child go? And who is this wilting flower that took her place? Your son has no filter. You cringe with anticipation at what he’ll say next. Personal space isn’t something he values – not his, not yours. You can see him rubbing people the wrong way, as he stands there clueless as to why they aren’t laughing back. There is no learning curve. You watch him destroy friendship after friendship. When a child has no social skills it can be painful to watch. Sometimes cringe worthy. Not everyone is born with social skills. It is a skill just like anything else and some kids need some social “tutoring.”

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 34: Do You Want to Help Your Child with OCD? Try ERP!

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 34: Do You Want to Help Your Child with OCD? Try ERP!

A child with OCD sits in my office. I ask if she is ready. She gives me a nervous nod. I place a Clorox wipe in her hand. She begins to breath heavily. Her OCD convinces her she is holding a death wipe. She imagines her hands spreading the contamination throughout her body, the poison flooding her veins.

I am not having a torture session, I am treating a child with OCD.

OCD is like a game of chicken. A game I am determined to help her win. We are calling OCD’s bluff, refusing to blink.

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 33: Why Kids Talk Back and How to Make it Stop!

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 33: Why Kids Talk Back and How to Make it Stop!

Your child screams, “I hate you!” She rolls her eyes and tells you, “No!” You feel your composure slipping away as she spits out her final words. In one fell swoop she has made you feel enraged and completely ineffective. You wonder, where did I go wrong? And why on earth does she feel she can talk back to me?

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 32: Stomach Pain and Anxiety: Partners in Crime

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 32: Stomach Pain and Anxiety: Partners in Crime

It’s another school day. Which means another stomach ache. Another battle of wills. Lots of tears. Lots of threats. Eat Dinner. Go to bed. Repeat. Why is your child constantly clutching their stomach? Why are they paralyzed with fear and…heartburn. Unfortunately stomach pain and anxiety like to hang out together and I mean – often. They are best friends and they like to team up against your child. 

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 31: Beyond Picky Eating | When Kids Have a Fear of Food

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 31: Beyond Picky Eating | When Kids Have a Fear of Food

   This page is brought to you by nOCD. Download this mobile tool for free! Beyond Picky Eating: When Kids have a Fear of Food Your kid is hungry. They haven’t eaten all day. But when you put food in front of them, they just stare at it. They worry about the taste. They worry about the brand. Is this the same brand as last […]

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 30: Looking to Start Child Counseling? How to Spot a Good Child Therapist!

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 30: Looking to Start Child Counseling? How to Spot a Good Child Therapist!

   This page is brought to you by nOCD. Download this mobile tool for free! If you are about to start child counseling -let’s talk!   You thought the decision to start child counseling was hard enough, but how are you supposed to know what makes a good child therapist? You are about to partner with a stranger to help you parent. Gulp. That’s a […]

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 29: What Makes Anxiety in Children Worse!

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 29: What Makes Anxiety in Children Worse!

Nobody gives parents a handbook when they pop out a kid. Even if they did, it probably wouldn’t have a chapter on anxiety in children. That’s why so many of us with anxious kids feel like we are sailing in a very lonely boat. A boat that no one really taught us how to sail.
She’s refusing to go to school again – is it cruel to make her go? Who the heck knows!
He needs me to be with him until he falls asleep – should I do it? Someone give me a clue!
She’s so shy, I order her food for her – am I helping or hurting her anxiety?
Let’s decode this mystery together. Grab a seat and let’s have a chat…

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 28: Help a Child with Anxiety by Setting Up This One Simple Thing.

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 28: Help a Child with Anxiety by Setting Up This One Simple Thing.

Do you want to help a child with anxiety? Life offers them two doors. Behind door #1 is fear, avoidance and misery. Behind door #2 is fear, bravery and determination. What door does your anxious child pick? What door do you pick for them? As parents, it is hard to not be overly sympathetic to our children with anxiety. Watching them squirm and suffer through anxiety is not fun. It is understandable that for some of us, we want to help our kids avoid this suffering by avoiding the root cause of their misery. Unfortunately, if you want to help a child with anxiety – you need to do just the opposite.

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 27: Want to Give Your Kids Anxiety Relief? Teach Them to Do This.

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 27: Want to Give Your Kids Anxiety Relief? Teach Them to Do This.

It sucks watching kids struggle with anxiety. Parents try all sorts of things to help, but often they are missing this key step. Forget about your breathing exercises, aromatherapy and distraction techniques. If you don’t teach your kids this, your anxious kids will never experience anxiety relief.

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 26: Why You Should Name Your Child’s Anxiety

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 26: Why You Should Name Your Child’s Anxiety

Children with anxiety can be self-haters. I’ve seen this over and over again in my therapy practice. Anxious kids tell me they feel stupid, insecure and paranoid. They wonder why they are paralyzed with fear, while everyone around them looks just fine. A child’s anxiety can cause tons of self-doubt. Anxiety is a self-esteem killer. Trust me, I know. I’ve been there. You can help your anxious child by naming your child’s anxiety. We aren’t trying to crush them, we are trying to crush their anxiety. You can do this by teaming up with your child and making your child’s anxiety the nemesis for both of you!

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 25: Signs of Child Anxiety Parents Often Miss | Part 1 of a 5 Part Series

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 25: Signs of Child Anxiety Parents Often Miss | Part 1 of a 5 Part Series

Your child explodes when he comes home from school. You spend hours trying to get him to bed. You have been dealing with mysterious stomach issues that have stumped your pediatrician. These are the subtle signs of child anxiety that are often missed.

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 24: Tired of Your Kids Fighting? Try This.

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 24: Tired of Your Kids Fighting? Try This.

It sounds like World War 3 in the other room. Words are flying. Fists are flying. You hope one of your offspring will survive. The sound of my kids fighting is like nails to the chalkboard. “Make it stop!” I plead to no one in particular. Even if I said it out loud, I doubt any of them would be able to hear me over the blood curdling screams.

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Ask the Child Therapist Episode 23: OCD Rituals are Often Mistaken for Tics in Children: Are you Missing Signs of OCD?

Ask the Child Therapist Episode 23: OCD Rituals are Often Mistaken for Tics in Children: Are you Missing Signs of OCD?

Your child is doing it again. That weird quirk. You cringe every time you see it. You tell her to stop. She tries, but there it is again. You tell yourself, it will pass. They all do. It’s always something different. Today it is some weird eye blinking and maybe next month she’ll blow into her hands. You’ve stopped keeping track of how many “strange habits” she has had or how long they last. But what if they aren’t “strange habits?”
What if they aren’t tics?

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